LESSON #3: SELF-JUDGEMENT=STRESS & SELF-COMPASSION=PEACE
RESISTANCE causes STRESS:
Another major way we feed our stress is through self-judgment. This shows up as things like self-loathing, perfectionism, shame, and guilt. As a culture we've got deep rooted habits around this constant self-judgement!
We throw the word love around a lot, but when it comes to ourselves, our love tends to be extremely conditional. And when we don't live up to our own impossible conditions, our inner mean girl comes out and we beat ourselves up with negative self talk, and self-sabotaging behaviors. And this simply feeds our stress.
You'll notice those self-judgement behaviors show up when:
- you make a mistake,
- you don't reach your goals quick enough or good enough (ie. career, relationship, money, health, etc.), or
- you fall back into a bad habit, once!
SELF-COMPASSION creates PEACE:
The way to heal stress fueled by self-judgement is through self-compassion, forgiveness, and unconditional love.
And since you're here, I have a feeling you're drive for healing, growth, and personal success causes you to be very hard on yourself. And embracing this concept of self-compassion may be your top peace struggle!
But know that there is nothing wrong with you! Self-judgement is a learned trait in our culture and therefore can be unlearned over time, with practice!
Below are some powerful ways to practice it on and off the meditation cushion.
STOP feeding your STRESS HABIT: Start to notice your tendency to judge yourself throughout your day and even when you meditate.
START feeding your PEACE HABIT: One of the simplest (yet most powerful) ways to shift from the stress-inducing energy of self-judgment to the peace-inducing energy of self-compassion, is through GRATITUDE.
GRATITUDE PRACTICE: Your practice today is to simply focus yourself (try some mindful breathing like we did in day 1) and sit quietly for 5 minutes, bringing to mind something you're grateful for about yourself or in your life. Visualize it and really feel the sensations and emotions of that love and gratitude.
OPTIONAL: If you want, you can go back and do the "Breath Meditation" from day 1 before doing your gratitude practice.
**Remember, there is ALWAYS something to be grateful for. If you struggle to find something, you're simply blocking yourself from seeing it. So take a deep breath, smile, maybe get outside in nature, and allow your gratitude to bubble up.
Peace, love, and a consistent practice,
P.S. You can access all past days here. Password: "PEACE" (all caps).
P.P.S To connect with others going through this 5 day experience + to get your questions answered by me, join the "Meditate with Ease" Facebook group here!