There's a common trait I've noticed in those who seem prone to happiness and success. You know the people I'm talking about. They have a lightness about them, that makes them feel really good to be around. They’re the ones who, if you didn't know any better, seem to just be blessed with good luck and a life of ease.

In contrast, there are also those who always seem to be stuck in some sort of crisis or discussing some sort of bad luck or circumstance they've found themselves in. Maybe you even feel yourself hopping on the complain train when you're with them (even when you hadn’t been aware anything was bothering you in the first place). They're nice enough, but for some reason you feel a drained, tired, cranky, or a heaviness after talking to them.  

One of the big differences I've noticed between those who seem blessed with ease and good fortune and those burdened with drama and bad luck, is surprisingly not the number or magnitude of difficult situations they experience, but the speed and ease in which they're able to move through and process them. 

Often the most powerful messages come in small and simple packages. And that’s exactly what I discovered after a workshop up at east coast’s spiritual mecca, Omega Institute, a few weeks ago. It was a lesson, packaged in 2 simple words, passed from renowned meditation teacher, Sharon Salzberg. A lesson that, if remembered and practiced, could save you hours, days, and even years of time and energy wasted in guilt and self-sabotage*. 

I truly believe that our experience of life has more to do with our thoughts and beliefs than our circumstances. Whether we consistently feel overwhelmed, anxious, worried, and indecisive or whether we feel grounded, capable, and calm, has all to do with our mindsets.

Through my transition from consistently feeling emotionally unstable and indecisive to feeling calm and in control of my life, I noticed some major subconscious mindsets that had to be shifted. Here they are along with the reframes I used to find more consistent peace of mind and happiness.

How do you know if your actually setting healthy boundaries, communicating effectively, and honoring your values?  It's simple.  

When you're standing in your power, following your heart, and honoring what's important to you, you'll naturally feel a sense of ease, flow, expansion, and connection in your life and relationships.

On the contrary, when your not standing in your power or aligned with your heart, and when your not honoring your boundaries, values, or needs, you'll feel tension, anxiety, contraction, and disconnection in your life and relationships. You'll also notice that you experience a lot of, what I like to call, "Emotional Crises".